May 24, 2018 -"If the Rocks Cry Out in Silence, So Will I"

Healing since leaving the hospital has improved exponentially compared to the time in the hospital. I thoroughly enjoyed my time in the hospital following this little procedure, but looking back on it now, I wish I were able to leave a couple days sooner. However, that wasn't in the cards.

It's neat how my initial perception of how something is going to go ends with an entirely different result. I guess that happens to all of us, every day, multiple times perhaps. We notice these differences of expected outcome versus reality when hopes are high. Perhaps not so much for smaller, insignificant events in life.

Tonight, as Melanie and I were listening to praise and worship music before bed, the song "So Will I" by Hillsong United came on. This song, for me, has been my anthem over the past two months. When praying for strength and faith during this two month roller coaster ride, this song tethered me to the only eternal thing that mattered, my response to the question of faith, "so will I."

One of the lines that caught my ear early on and one that I pointed out to a lot of close friends was "if the rocks cry out in silence, so will I." Considering the outcome of being cured of my tumor, I knew there was a chance that my voice would be impacted and even permanently absent, but I never invested much thought into that being an actual outcome. Well, here we are. I am without a nerve that controls my left vocal cord and am barely able to whisper on a good day. Melanie looked at me tonight and said, "your favorite line in your song is rather prophetic, isn't it?"

God works in ways that we may never know in this life. But I know that God works all things according to His will. During this season of my life, I pray that like the rocks, I may cry out in silence, praising and worshiping my Father in Heaven. All the while, I have hopes of a long-term solution in place restoring my voice.